You would not be surprised to learn that when kids lie it is a natural brain activity. In the movie South Pacific one of my favorite songs is You Have to Be Taught. It is a common thing for kids to lie and we should not be alarmed.
Kids tell lies for the same reasons adults do:
1) To escape punishment
2) To make a good impression
3) To spare someones feelings
Usually parents, teachers and the whole community raises to the opportunity to teach kids everything they need to know while growing up. Unfortunately, this is a behavior that has to be UN-TAUGHT. Instead of teaching, we are trying to undo a behavior that just comes naturally. It is truly amazing to me that I truly understand the 3 reasons kids give for telling a lit.
A \"Tween\", ages 8-12, left a comment on my blog and I want to tell you what she said: \"Everyone will eventually lie in their life! I have lied a few times and it leads to more and more lies sometimes. I wish that we didn\'t have to lie for impressions, to escape punishment and to spare someones feelings. I am strangely good at knowing when someone is lying to me. I hate when I am being lied to because it hurts. I want respect like everyone wants. We need to end the lying. I know that when you lie for punishment, it is because you don\'t want to be grounded or something. But if you tell the truth most of the time then the punishment will be a lot easier than when you tell a lie and then your parents or guardian finds out you lied to them\".
An article that I read was very strict that parents need to explain to their kids the difference between a lie and a fib. They encouraged parents to tell the kids that everyone has to fib once in a while and that is OK. I can only imagine how confusing this must be to kids. But even if you would try to explain to your kids the difference between a lie and a fib; it would be very important NOT to say to your kid \"Don\'t you lie to me\". The kid may be thinking he/she is telling a fib instead of lie and they will throw it right back to your face that they are telling a fib, not a lie. Well as always, let\'s just keep on doing the best we can in raising our kids without intentionally confusing me..
Rosalie Lynch is a Certified Life Coach who works with parents and kids in figuring out how to live together. You are invited to check out the blog \"The Kids Speak Out\" at http://www.uachieve.blogs.com/kids
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